When me and my friends were getting married, we all passed around a book called The Conscious Bride. It’s a great resource for couples during the transitional time of engagement that can be quite emotional, but that many people feel should only be a “happy” time. I think I can speak for all of us when I say that, even when we didn’t think we needed it, it helped us be ok recognizing that not every waking moment was happy! happy! joy! joy!
Sheryl Paul is the author of the book, but her focus is not only on weddings. She truly is an expert in transitions as a whole. To me it feels like she takes a slightly female bent, but having read her work during my wedding process, I often felt that the book should be called “The Conscious Bride and Groom” because it really gave us a lot of good things to talk and think about as a couple.
What I like most about Sheryl’s work is that she confronts head-on the fantasies that often surround so many of life’s big transitions, like weddings and babies. Societally we build up these moments in such a way that when they appear, and if they don’t match reality, we are literally shocked.
Now that a lot of my friends are having babies, I often hear them say how truly difficult parenting is and that they wish someone had told them. My theory in life in general is that most of life’s experiences are not Hallmark cards, but it’s the Hallmark moments within those experiences that make it all worthwhile. It’s a balance, in being open to what change really means and allowing yourself to feel the full range of emotions that comes with change. For me, this process provides the tools to not be so shocked because you know that whatever you are feeling is normal for you. It’s giving yourself permission to just be.
Whoah! That’s a lot deeper than I intended to get, but Sheryl’s work does really move me, and as I sit here listening to her interview with Alanis Morissette (it’s an hour live recording!), I’m loving the honesty of the conversation. It’s clear that Alanis has done a lot of self-work that many of you may have done, or are doing, and it’s nice to hear it from another person’s point of view.
Since so many of our Deposit a Gift users are experiencing life’s biggest celebrations, which are often life’s biggest transitions, I thought it was a perfect thing to share with you through our blog. No matter what you are going through, Sheryl’s blog, Conscious Transitions, is a great resource. If you scroll down to the bottom of her blog’s homepage you can sign-up for her free eZine; if you do that, as a gift from her you’ll also get her free 78-page FREE E-Book called “Conscious Transitions: The Seven Most Common (and Traumatic) Life Changes.” I just signed-up myself and am really excited about it!
Thanks to Sheryl for keeping in touch and letting us know about her fascinating interview with Alanis Morissette on her marital and motherhood transitions.
A bit about Sheryl in case you’re curious…
Sheryl Paul, M.A., pioneered the field of bridal counseling in 1998. She has since counseled thousands of people worldwide through her private practice, her bestselling books, “The Conscious Bride” and “The Conscious Bride’s Wedding Planner,” and her websites, www.consciousweddings.com and www.consciousmotherhood.com.